Self-esteem is a measure of how much you like yourself and how you feel about yourself, your person in front of others. If you’re happy and you feel good, you have high self-esteem.
If you feel good then you feel a person below the others, or you feel bad, you have low self esteem.
To get your ex …
People like you and your likes you, will want to spend time with you, have the same level of self-esteem than you.
People who really do not want to spend time, have very different levels of self-esteem to yours.
This is why relationships with others have ups and downs. Our self-esteem is not fixed, and is due to our situations … changes every day … so your feelings towards people who are part of your life will change constantly.
Here a rule that will create a good friendship or relationship.
«We all create relationships with people who reflect ourselves in our current level of self-esteem.»
This is the reason why the friendship and relations with other work. If a person undergoes changes in self-esteem permanently, all people feel that they have nothing in common … and there is no future, separate …
Here a little story to explain how this can affect couples.
Maria is happily coming home from work after having a great day … the acendierón at work and had a raise. Drive down the road and when I got home she notices George’s car already arrived.
«Hmm … that’s not normal» thinks Maria
«George does not usually get home until six»
Maria aestaciona his car, gets out, and walks to the front door, his good humor fades …
After entering the house looking for Jorge, it is sitting at the table with his head in his hands.
Very worried, she sits next to him …
«What happened honey?» Maria asked, touching the hand of Jorge.
Jorge tells all about the layoffs at work, and shows him his pink slip.
Maria then decided it would be best not to tell George about his promotion, at least she thinks she is not the time yet.
At tea time, the conversation becomes difficult. Maria tries to be optimistic, but can not seem to connect with Jorge. He does not speak, and not really interested in anything, because this devastated.
In the coming days are very distant. George really did not react to the news of promoting Maria and raise, Maria receives the call carlos … a fellow of the college …
«Hmm may be …» Maria thinks »
(Here, Jorge and Maria self-esteem levels are very different. Their conversation does not happen, and the two do not really want to spend time together. Maria out with Carlos, because the level of self-esteem is closer Carlos Maria, Jorge .)
It is the weekend, Janet wait a boring weekend. As the door opens … receives a very happy Jorge »
«Guess what?» Says Jorge happily … waving a sheet of paper in his hands …
Without waiting for an answer, Jorge Maria tells all about the new work that just got …
(Jorge and their levels of self-esteem as Maria are now equal … Maria forgets Carlos … and the lives of George and Maria at home will continue as usual)
Is low self-esteem and makes couples to separate, because there is affinity and that people get tired. If self-esteem levels of Maria and Jorge remain at different levels for too long … is safe to be separated.
Is that why you and your ex separated? Maybe yes, maybe not … low self-esteem is not always easy to detect, especially if you know how to look.
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