A rule in dating probably heard say is not back with your ex. And while there may be plenty of reasons why an ex not deserve a second chance, there are also many reasons why so.
But how do you know if it’s worth trying to get back with your ex or is this just a disaster waiting to happen?
Ways to know if you should get back with your ex.
You never know for sure if it will happen unless you try. My current boyfriend and I broke up almost two years ago for a few months. Obviously, we ended up coming back and I could not be happier with this decision – our «new» relationship is a million times better than the old.
In my case, I miss my ex definitely return if it was worth it. If at this point you are thinking rekindle an old romance, think about these things before.
– Everyone should take some time to be alone.
By «some time», I do not mean a couple of days or one week … I mean at least one month. I know it sounds like you would a long time, but this is my reasoning: it is normal to feel like you want your ex back immediately after the break.
But if you spend a month and still wants to be with this person as much as you wanted a day after the break, it means that maybe things are not over between them yet.
If the relationship ended, it was for a reason. Both need a good amount of time to be alone and figure things out for yourself before deciding you want to get back with your ex.
– How you want your relationship change?
Think about how you want to be your new relationship with your ex to come back. Before taking this step, you need to know exactly what needs to be changed between you. Before you talk to your ex, find out what you want and what is most important to you. You can make a list if that helps.
Your expectations should not be too large, though (if they are, that’s a sign that perhaps should not be returned). For example, maybe you want him to not spend more time with their friends or to call you more often. Think about what would make you happy.
– Your friends support the idea.
Most of the time, your friends are going to encourage you to stay away from your ex in an attempt to help. And although not always be right, sometimes if you have it. If your friends ask you to not give him a second chance, ask them why. They may be seeing something that is not.
If you think about it and do not seem totally be against your idea back with your ex, that’s a good sign that your friends think you might be best for you. Sometimes it helps to have an outside perspective (though you want your is ultimately the most important instance).
– If he did something really bad, you are ready to forgive him?
If broken because he did something and I hurt a lot, be sure to be ready to forgive before thinking about starting again relationship. Many women return with a guy who’s cheating and then find they can not forgive.
If you’re not willing to forgive and move on, you can not possibly start a relationship with that person again. It’s fine if you’re not willing to forgive, but you will not be able to make it work.
– You really need him, not only of the relationship.
This is an important example of why it is really necessary to give a little time before you give your ex a second chance. Think about it: do you really miss your ex or just want to have a relationship?
Must not come back with an ex just to have a new boyfriend. You just need to get back with an ex if you really, really miss that person.
– Have you had an honest conversation about what happened.
Once you’ve finished figure things out on your own, that is to say solved your problems, you obviously need to have a conversation with your ex. An honest conversation, not one in which the two are like by claiming.
«I miss you, I can not live without you!» Talk about what you both want change, they want in the future and what has been happening while they were together.
– The one who did something wrong sincerely sorry.
Apologies obviously should be, most likely for both. Ruptures usually is never the fault of one person. If you did something to hurt, you should definitely give you a real apology. If he did something wrong, you must have a sincere apology from him too.
– I really think they can fix problems.
As I said earlier, clearly believes answer this question: Why did you break up? Was it something in which you can work, just do not have enough time the other person?
Or was for something much bigger, such as distance or one of you wants something the other person does not want? If problems I had before can not be resolved, there is no reason to get back with your ex … your relationship will end how it was before. But if both want to work on solving things, then things will work.
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